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Posts tagged ‘choices’

Day 21: Climbing back on the wagon

I’ve already managed to blow off my gym plan, but I’ve got a 5-day step goal streak going, so I’m gonna take that as a win. Unfortunately, I don’t feel as excited and pumped about this challenge as I did before. I’ve been feeling out of sorts lately. I’m stuck in some sort of funk or rut, or whichever is the best way to describe it.

The thing is, I’ve gained back some of the weight I’d lost these past few months. Realistically, it’s probably only about 5 lbs, but when you’re as short as I am, that translates to anywhere from one to two clothing sizes. In terms of measurements, my waist size seems to have increased by a whole two inches. My super comfy jeans are now super tight jeans, and the muffin top I’d finally managed to get rid of, is back with a vengeance. I feel gross.

But, instead of feeling motivated by this to climb back on the wagon, I feel stuck. I’m in that spot; you know, the one where you know you need to make a change – and you want to make a change – but you just can’t get yourself to actually do it. So, instead of making positive changes, you just make worse choices.

I have a Bod Pod appointment tomorrow, so I’m hoping my latest results will give me the kick in the ass I need to shake this funk. I don’t feel all that confident about it though. I know I need to change my mindset, but that’s just not where I’m at right this moment. Hopefully, I’ll feel differently tomorrow.

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Day 7: The choices we make

I chose to blow off my step goal last night. It wasn’t an easy choice, I thought about it a lot, but in the end it’s the choice I made.

I spent most of the day working at my computer. I used to stand while I worked, but lately I’ve been sitting at the kitchen table instead. By the time I decided to clock out for the day it was already late in the afternoon and I hadn’t even reached 5,000 steps.

I had plans to meet a friend later on so I assumed we’d do a lot of walking, but we didn’t. Despite my sedentary day, I was exhausted and ready for bed the minute I got home.

As I lay in bed last night, I remembered my step goal and checked my watch. I was barely at 5,000 steps. Hitting my goal at that time would have required 10,000 steps worth of living room laps. It was a bit past 9 pm by then, so I knew I had enough time to do it… but I didn’t want to. I was tired – so, so tired.

I thought about the precedent I would set for myself by not walking those laps. It motivated me enough to get up and walk a few, but I just didn’t have it in me to keep going. I just wanted to go to sleep.

Afterwards, it occurred to me that if I were further along in my streak, I may very well have pushed myself to walk those 10,000 steps – but, I was only two days in. In the grand scheme of things, that didn’t seem like all that much.

I don’t regret the decision I made, but I don’t want to have to make that decision again in the future. I want to successfully complete this challenge without dragging it out another two or three years.

Thankfully I’m a lot closer to my goal this evening. I had to volunteer to walk the dog to get there, but I did it. I’ll still need to walk a bunch of laps before bed, but it feels doable. I intend to start this week on the right foot.

Happy Monday!

Day 5: Two steps forward, one step back

After two successful days, I failed to hit my step goal on Thursday. I don’t have any good excuses to give for falling short – I just forgot. I checked my steps around 7:00 pm. I told myself I should get up off the couch and walk some laps, but I didn’t. Instead, I put the kids to bed and fell asleep myself.

Normally, I’d feel discouraged by a setback like this, but not this time. Sure, it’s disappointing, but I chose to brush it off and view it as a reminder of the obstacles I’ll have to face to successfully complete this challenge – mainly, my tendency to forget all about it in the first place.

It won’t be easy, but I’m feeling pretty confident. I may have failed on Thursday, but I’ve hit my goal every day since then and I have a whopping two-day streak going! It may not seem like much, but it’s progress.

Day 76: I did it!

I made it to the gym this morning. I didn’t want to go. I dreaded it the entire walk there, but I went and I worked out. Granted, I felt weak and cranky, but I got it done.

That being said, I realized I’m not really enjoying this new workout I’m doing. I’m not sure whether to stick with it, or try something different. I won’t make any decisions about it tonight, but I will definitely give it some thought and try to come up with something tomorrow.

Regardless, I’ll stick with the program for now. My husband won’t be around in the morning, and I have to work, but I should be able to complete my scheduled high intensity interval training (HIIT) early in the am from home, before the kids wake up… assuming I wake up on time that is. I’ve been averaging about 4 hours of sleep a night, so yeah, I’m exhausted. I need a real, full night’s sleep.

Final Step Count: 18,477

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