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Posts tagged ‘success’

Day 54: The ups and downs

I struggled yesterday. I had to walk a whole lot of living room laps to hit my daily step goal, I failed to eat enough protein for the 5th day in a row, and I almost went over my calorie range.

Key word: almost. I’ve gotten into the habit of logging my food before I eat it. I’ve found it gives me the opportunity to think through my choices before I make them. For instance, I made pasta for dinner. I overdid it at lunch time, so I really needed to pay attention to how much I ate in order to stay within my calorie range. I created the recipe in MyFitnessPal as I cooked and logged it, quickly realizing that eating a full portion would bring me to the top of my calorie range – there would be no room for a cocktail (or chocolate chip cookie) after dinner. I decided to eat a smaller portion and save the leftover calories for later. I successfully ended the day within my calorie range and without feeling deprived.

Then there’s today. Despite doing all the right things that worked yesterday, I eventually caved today and threw caution to the wind. I didn’t exceed the top of my calorie range by a whole lot, but I still went over.

I began writing this post to say something along the lines of how one minute you think you’ve figured out the trick to staying in control, and the next minute you’ve lost it; but I realized I’d basically already written that post a couple of months ago when I wrote about willpower. This isn’t a new issue. It’s just more of the same.

On the bright side, I didn’t binge. I didn’t say “fuck it” and eat everything in sight. That right there is progress.

Current step total: 14,729

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Day 44: Rain, rain, go away!

I woke up in a much better mood than yesterday, despite heading into a second day of nonstop rain.

I don’t know if most people experience random “low” moods, but I definitely do. They can be pretty frustrating, for a lack of a better word. There’s no apparent cause for them, and they’re hard to really explain or understand. They’re not necessarily bad moods – I’m not angry or sad. It’s more like a numb feeling? Like I said, it’s just a weird mood to be in.

Fortunately, since I’ve started this challenge, my “low” moods have been practically non-existent. One of the most positive changes that have occurred over the last 44 days since this challenge started is the change in how much better I feel overall. Not just in the physical sense, but in my mental and emotional state as well.

These past couple of weeks, I’ve felt the best I have in years. It’s not that I’ve necessarily felt happier, but that I feel a lot more in control of my life. As a person who was diagnosed with attentive deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) as a grown up, I’ve struggled with adulting. I’ve lived in this sort of fog and chaos, jumping from one thing to the next haphazardly, unable to remember important things, and feeling utterly incapable of accomplishing even the most basic tasks.

Trying to find the right medication after being diagnosed has been a lot harder than I thought it would be. The side effects of stimulant medications can be rough, and determining the proper dose takes a lot of trial and error. Toss is a pregnancy, and it’s taken me over three years to finally get on the right medication at the right dose.

While I’m sure finally getting my medication right has a lot to do with how much better I’ve been feeling, I’m confident the changes I’ve made during this challenge have also had a significant impact. I’m much more active and I’ve been working out consistently. As a result, I’ve been sleeping better. I’m drinking less alcohol, so it’s easier to get up in the mornings and make it to the gym. Now that I’m eating less, I feel less bloated and heavy. Every small change feeds into the next.

It’ll be interesting to see how I’ll continue to change as I become more inconsistent in meeting all of my goals. I like to think any changes will be positive ones, not just in how I look on the outside, but in how I feel on the inside.

Current step total: 9,011

Current step goal streak: 14 days  

Previous step goal streak: 2 days

Longest step goal streak: 14 days

Day 36: Week 6

Yesterday’s post got me thinking about how far I’ve come since I started this challenge. No, I haven’t lost 10 lbs or dozens of inches off my waist and thighs, but I have continued to make positive changes; which was sort of the whole point.

When I started this challenge five weeks ago, I was steadily gaining weight. I was drinking a couple of cocktails a night. I wasn’t exercising, I was eating everything in sight, and I was feeling pretty awful, both physically and emotionally.

By starting this challenge, I had hoped I could get the snowball of positive change rolling. By writing this blog, I was hoping for accountability. I feel like I’ve been successful on both fronts.

Although I’ve struggled and had my fair share of failures meeting my goals every day, I’ve made a lot of progress so far. In weeks one through five of this challenge:

  • I’ve averaged over 15,000 steps a day since day one.
  • I’ve lost most of the weight I’d regained over my vacation – approximately 4 lbs.
  • I’ve lost an inch and a half from my waist and an inch from my hips.
  • I’ve stopped drinking alcohol most nights.
  • And most importantly, I’m feeling so much better about myself and my ability to reach my goals.

I’m feeling a lot more motivated overall. I’ve felt less anxious, and I’ve also felt a sense of accomplishment at sticking with this, despite the ups and downs. I’m excited to see what the next few weeks bring.

Current step count: 6,242

Current step goal streak: 6 days
Previous step goal streak: 2 daysLongest step goal streak: 13 days
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